Overcoming External Roadblocks, Including Toxic Company Culture
Show Notes
In this episode, we’re diving deep into the external factors that can get in the way of creating a supportive, human-centered culture at work. Whether it’s company culture, unsupportive bosses, or personal responsibilities, these roadblocks are real and frustrating.
I’m sharing practical steps to question and creatively navigate these external challenges. We’ll talk about giving yourself permission to approach things differently, finding easy wins when bigger changes feel impossible, and why self-care and joy are essential to sustaining your leadership journey.
Take Action
Use the two step process in the episode to work through any external situations preventing you from making changes. Check out the edited and oh-so-nicely organized transcript below for a recap of the two steps.
And if you’re struggling with toxic work cultures or just need someone to listen, reach out to me—I’ve been there, and I get it. You can always message me.
Organized Transcript
Hey, you're here. This is the Change Lives With Your Leadership podcast, and it's for leaders and managers who want to leverage the coolest f*cking thing ever. The fact that as a leader, you get to change people's lives every single day without any of the corporate or toxic f*ckery.
Hey, Odalis here…
So in the last episode, we talked about how your mind and thoughts can get in the way of you making the changes you want to make for your people. But it's not just your mind that can get in the way.
External factors
There can be very real external factors out of your control that can also keep you from creating the kind of spaces and culture that you want for your team. So we're going to talk about those in this episode.
At work, this can be things like the company culture not supporting certain changes or your boss not supporting the changes that you want to make. These can be real roadblocks that make it tough to move in the direction that you want to go.
There can also be external roadblocks outside of work that impact your ability to do things at work. For example, you may want to start a weekly game night for your team to bond and have fun together outside of work. But you've got some other chosen priorities like kids at home or aging parents to care for.
So let's start with the people and cultures at work that can get in the way of the changes you want to make.
Roadblocks at work
I'm just going to say it because I have felt this so many times before… and I think it will help you to know that it's not just you, by any means.
Doing things differently at work…
Specifically trying to create more human-centered spaces and a supportive culture…
When most people are still doing things “the way they've always been done”…
Can be frustrating to start…
And absolutely devastating after months or years of trying to fight against and live with the toxic practices that exist in most companies.
Toxic work cultures can make this f*cking hard…
Changing the environment and culture for your team at work is f*cking hard at many companies.
There will be bosses who notice that you're allowing your team to ask for PTO the next day and ask you to change it to at least two weeks before.
There will be other managers at your company that tell you to enforce disciplinary action on one of your team members for some small mistake they made, even though you're trying to create a safe environment where mistakes are not treated like punishable catastrophes.
Your boss will ask you to implement a significant change without any reasons or consideration for the impact to your team. And they will want it to be implemented immediately.
All of these have happened to me.
The rage, the heartbreak, the feeling of defeat have all hit me so many times before.
I have seriously considered quitting being a manager and leader many times in my career. I actually took a break at one point. I've fantasized about going back to being an individual contributor with less responsibility for others and more focus on myself and tasks that I can fully control.
When you care about people, it hurts when you feel like you've failed to protect them from the crap everyone else seems to accept and then expects you to go along with.
It can hurt deeply because you care deeply.
And in those moments where you want to give up…
And get small…
And find just a little bit of peace anywhere that you can find it…
Do what is best for you.
That may very well be stepping out of a management or leadership position.
That may be going with what you're asked to do and putting up less of a fight.
Not what you were expecting…
I'm sure you weren't expecting me to say that, especially in our culture where quitting is bad and shameful and pathetic.
You're supposed to fight for those who can't fight for themselves and keep going when things get tough. And I'm not saying that that's bad or wrong either.
The point I'm trying to make is that none of your choices are shameful or guilt-worthy.
If you read anything by Angela Davis, Maya Angelou, bell hooks, you'll see how they speak of the importance of taking care of yourself and making joy a regular practice. That's right, a practice, something that you do on purpose on a regular basis.
They say it because they know how hard it is to go against what most people are doing. They know that sometimes the wins feel small and are separated by long stretches of stabbing losses. After decades of working to change the world, they know that without self-care and joy and moments of aliveness and beauty, you will get burnt out and give up because it's the only way to protect yourself, to save yourself.
No judgement…
So there's no judgment or shame with choosing to step away from this type of change work.
It is hard work and many people have stepped away from it to save their own lives. And that's not bad. That's not selfish. That's the reality of being human and being able to experience significant pain and trauma.
I just want you to know that that's not the only path that's available to you. You don't have to go down the road of fight, fight, fight for change until you just can't anymore.
There are alternatives.
You can choose to be mindful of your own self-care.
You can choose to take breaks and not fight every battle that presents itself.
You can choose to purposefully experience joy and laughter and love on a daily basis so that you are well-resourced enough to help others.
There are many paths…
Changing the world, changing people's lives isn't a single path that looks the same for everyone. There are many ways to do this work.
Some of us focus on the root causes, the systems that prevent us from living in a more supportive and loving world. Those are the activists working for reform, abolishment, and change at the source of the powers that have created the current version of our society.
Some of us focus on taking care of people who are being most impacted by our current systems in society right now and are experiencing suffering right now.
One option isn't better, more worthy, more deserving than the other.
There aren't even only two options.
So you can make a conscious choice about the path, about the approach that you want to take.
And it may change over time as you change, as your life changes, as the world changes. And that's okay too. You don't have to choose something and stick with it forever.
The truth…
Right now, in this moment, if you want to change the way that people are treated at work, know that some days, weeks, months will be hard.
And yet…
It is still work worth doing.
For all the times you do succeed.
For all the ways that you do change things for the better for your people.
For all the times that your people will tell you that what you did…
Made the difference…
Gave them hope when they didn't have any…
You saw them and listened to them and helped them and supported them when no one else did…
It is worth it.
And it serves you. It helps you as much as it helps your people.
The world is constantly changing because the world is made up of humans, animals, and nature that are constantly in flux. So what you do matters.
Remember the ripples…
The seemingly small change that you are successful in implementing gets added to all the other work and changes being made by people with similar missions and perspectives about the world we can create. All of those efforts come together to make a bigger impact.
That's why I talk so often about the ripples we create. Because small changes, big changes, they all ripple into something bigger.
It happens every day.
We just can't always see the connections.
But they are always there.
Now, if in this moment you're deciding that you want to continue doing the work of changing lives for your people at work, then here are some real steps that you can take when you run into blockers.
Whether they're from within your company and its culture, or things that are happening outside of work that are impacting work.
Step 1
Just like we discussed in the previous episode, Overcoming the Mental F*ckery…
The first thing you want to do when you run into any external blocker like your boss or your company's culture or any obligations that you have from adulting and life-ing:
I want you to question it.
You still want to start by determining if it's a real roadblock or not. Sometimes our minds try to convince us that external factors have more power than they really do (because they're trying to protect us). Make sure that's not what's going on here.
Yes, your boss may have been against some of the changes you proposed in the past, but is that the actual case this time? Do you know for a fact that your boss is against the change you want to make this time? Or is it your mind using assumptions and over-dramatized consequences to convince you not to do it?
Step 2
If it truly is a roadblock:
Then question whether it has to be.
Give yourself permission to think about alternate solutions. Let those creative problem-solving skills leak all over this roadblock.
Worst case scenario, you pick something else to change.
Which honestly is not a bad thing at all because every change will have an impact and it will ripple out in ways you can't predict.
So if right now isn't the time for a specific change because of some external situation…
You can pick something else.
Your team will still benefit.
Make it easy on your mind...
And if you want to make it as easy as possible for your mind to get on board when you're worried about external factors getting in the way:
Pick something your mind thinks is easy and non-threatening.
You'll know you've identified it when your mind doesn't feel the need to make a daytime-soap-opera out of the decision.
There is nothing wrong with choosing something easy. Harder things aren't better or more worthy.
And if that's coming up for you, I can tell you right now…
Without a doubt…
That is a thought and not a fact.
So let that thought be on its way because it's not needed here. It's not helpful here.
Don’t forget…
Now don't forget, reach out to me if you have any questions, thoughts, or you just need someone to listen to you talk about how toxic the culture is at your company and how hard that can make it to create positive change for your people.
I've been there and I get how frustrating, defeating, and draining it can be. I won't judge, shame, or guilt you about any of it or any choices that you make because of those experiences.
So whether you choose to keep trying to change things for your people or you choose to step away for your own mental health and care, I'm here to support you.
Being witnessed is a gift…
And if you know of other leaders or managers struggling to make changes because of toxic work cultures, share this episode with them.
Let them feel seen and understood and not judged.
Being witnessed can be incredibly powerful when it happens without judgment or shame or guilt.
It can truly be a gift.
So share this episode if you think it will help them.
In the next episode…
We'll talk about how to implement the change that you want to make for your people and how to use that as another opportunity to create even more ooey gooey goodness for your people. I can't wait!
And if you're choosing to continue with this journey of changing the lives of your people (which again is not a better or worse choice than any other choice)…
I want us to continue to change lives with our leadership—together.